


Love so sudden and so sweet

by kaijuborn



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, M/M, Swearing, blowjob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 21:03:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7907566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaijuborn/pseuds/kaijuborn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where Jesse meets Hanzo in Hanamura during a mission when they are both young. Jesse falls fast and hard for Hanzo, and they share a night neither of them will ever forget.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love so sudden and so sweet

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was inspired by the countless other fics/fanart where Jesse and Hanzo meet when they are young! Note: this fic has some Jesse/Genji in it as well, but it is fairly innocent. This fic also has both top!Hanzo and top!Jesse, if that's your thing (or if it isn't).

The best part of being with Blackwatch, Jesse had decided, was being able to travel the world and have someone else pay for it. Sure, he always flew budget and the transition hours were long and dull, the motels cheap and the food sub par, but still. He was in _Japan_.

 

He had been there for two days already; the first day had been spent entirely on sleeping off his jet lag and trying to calm down an upset stomach. The second day he had claimed to still feel bad, to be able to go out into the city and enjoy the sights a bit. Hanamura was beautiful this time of year, though he didn't doubt it would've been beautiful any time of the year; cherry blossoms in bloom everywhere, the streets packed with vendors and locals and tourists, the air clear and filled with gentle chatter and soothing music. Jesse had spent the entire day just walking around, taking it all in.

 

When the third day arrived he supposed it was time to actually start doing what he was supposed to be doing. He was there for a mission, after all.

 

His task was to glean some information from the infamous Shimada clan. Several agents had tried before, each traditional attempt at distracting information, whether it was through blackmail or hacking, had failed. Jesse wasn't quite sure if he was supposed to be Blackwatch's trump card, or a last resort.

 

In either case, he knew exactly how to get what he wanted. He had read up on the meager reports concerning the Shimada family and while they lacked a lot of things he would have liked to know, one person stood out in particular.

 

His name was Genji. There were more photos of him than the other family members combined, his neon green hair making him stand out in any crowd. The majority of the photos showed him in bars, clubs, restaurants and other entertainment establishments. He was always smiling or laughing, a drink in his hand, surrounded by both men and women, all equally handsome.

 

Jesse knew exactly how to sweet-talk that type of guy. So long as he could find Genji among the numerous clubs and bars around the more modern districts of Hanamura, he didn't doubt he could get the information from him within a couple of hours. And who knew? Maybe he could have some fun as well. Genji wasn't particularly bad looking.

 

The streets were just as busy after the sun had set, multicolored lanterns painting the scenery in warm pink, orange and purple tones. The scent of the food being sold along the streets mingled with the petals sailing through the air, covering the ground like a soft pink carpet. Jesse felt oddly _alive_ ; he didn't know how else to explain it. The crisp air made everything seem so clear, the thrill of being on a mission made the tips of his fingers tingle and there was a hum of exhilaration deep in his chest, making his heart flutter.

 

It only took him about an hour to find Genji. It was in a bar clearly meant for younger people, the interior sharp and modern but in dark colors, and with dim lighting, which gave it a strangely cozy mood. One corner was dedicated to oldschool arcade games, where a number of twenty-somethings had gathered and were yelling at someone playing a game which beeped and booped and flashed in neon colors.

 

Jesse spotted Genji sitting on a large sofa along with his entourage; the sofas and the low table were slightly sunk down into the floor, a spot clearly meant for VIPs. The table was full of glasses, both empty and full ones, and there was constant talking and chattering from the people. Jesse glanced at them as he walked in; even though Genji was sitting in the middle of it all, he didn't appear to be talking. He was smiling, watching his friends and listening to them, almost like a king in his court.

 

Genji looked up and their eyes met. Jesse had to admit he was more handsome in real life than he had been on the blurry photos. He nodded a bit, giving him a sly smile and touching the brim of his hat in greeting. He could see Genji's eyebrows raise, clearly surprised and amused at the gesture.

 

Jesse headed over to the bar and sat down on a high stool, ordering a beer and waiting.

 

He had barely finished a third of his drink when a waiter came up to him, carrying a tray with a green drink that matched Genji's hair. Jesse grinned. He didn't need to ask to know who had sent it to him. The waiter pointed it out for him anyway.

 

“From Mr. Shimada”, she said, nodding towards him.

 

Jesse took the drink and looked over at Genji, finding him to be watching him, an amused smile on his lips. Jesse considered playing hard to get for a moment, but then jumped down from his stool and walked over to the sofas with slow, confident steps, keeping eye contact with Genji the entire way. Genji's smile turned into a pleased smirk when Jesse sunk down on the sofa next to him. The people around them cast curious glances, interested to see where things were going.

 

“Howdy”, Jesse drawled. He didn't know Japanese and kind of wished he did, since it would've made things a lot easier, but it also would've undermined his cover as a clueless American tourist.

 

“ _Howdy_ ”, Genji repeated, clearly amused. He paused for a beat, studying him. “You are a cowboy.”

 

“That's right”, Jesse said, grinning. “The name's Jesse McCree. Pleasure to meet ya.”

 

“Genji”, was the name he got back. No last name, either because he didn't want to give away who he was, or because he assumed Jesse already knew. Jesse guessed it was the second option.

 

“Thanks fer the drink. I appreciate it.” Jesse took a sip of it. It was stronger than he expected and he couldn't stop a grimace, which made Genji chuckle. It was a nice sound. “What is is?” Jesse wondered, and Genji answered something in Japanese. “Yeah, I have no idea what that means.”

 

“You are new here”, Genji said, cocking his head to one side.

 

“Jus' got here three days ago.”

 

“Do you like it?”

  
“It's beautiful”, Jesse said, truthfully. “Jus' like the people”, he added with a wink, voice sugary sweet. Genji seemed to be trying to hide a smile, and failing at it.

 

“So you're a charmer, are you?” he wondered, leaning a bit closer.

 

“Only if there's someone around to charm”, Jesse said, which made Genji snicker. This close Jesse could see Genji's cheeks had a pink tint to him; it was sweet and made him look younger, but Jesse wasn't sure if it was because of the compliments or the booze. Either one worked for him, to be honest.

 

Genji was easy and fun to talk to; he seemed genuinely interested in everything about Jesse in a way he guessed went beyond just a casual flirt. He asked about the hat, the belt buckle, the sheriff's star tattoo poking out underneath the collar of Jesse's shirt. He asked if he had a real cowboy revolver, if he knew how to tame a wild horse, throw a lasso and ride a bull. Jesse was more than glad to answer any of his questions, finding real joy in doing so, a rare pleasure in being sincerely _interesting_ to someone else.

 

In turn, Jesse asked questions about Genji too. He started small; asking about the green hair, his traditional clothing, his preference when it came to bars and drinks. When Genji kept drinking Jesse did his best not too, trying to keep a straight head as his mark became even more talkative when he got drunk. Jesse started probing about his education, future plans and family. Genji answered some questions, others he simply laughed at and sometimes he answered in Japanese, which was mildly frustrating. But Jesse got quite a bit of information anyway, not everything Blackwatch had been looking for but enough to earn him a nice paycheck.

 

The people who had been sitting around them quickly grew tired of their conversation and unabashed flirting and left one after one, leaving them alone on the sofa. Somehow Jesse's arm wound up around Genji's shoulders, and Genji kept his hand on Jesse's knee, slowly rubbing with his thumb, sending sparks of desire up into his groin.

 

He knew he had most of the information the needed already, so what was the harm in taking it a step further? If he got Genji back to his motel room, perhaps he'd share even more things. It was personal desire too, he wouldn't deny that; Genji was sweet and funny, and his genuine appreciation was something Jesse realized that he craved.

 

It didn't take too long before Genji leaned in, smiling, catching Jesse's lips in a kiss. Jesse made a pleased noise and closed his eyes, kissing him back, pulling him a bit closer.

 

It had been some time since Jesse had just kissed someone like this, just locking lips with a good-looking guy for God knew how long, licking and nibbling and sucking, making him gasp and chuckle. It was nice. In a way he almost didn't want to take it any further; if they had sex they would eventually have to stop. Making out you could do forever.

 

A harsh, brief word in Japanese made Genji quickly pull away, turning his head. He said something as well, echoing the word spoken to him.

 

Jesse looked up at the young man who had spoken. His breath caught in his throat. He immediately knew who it was; Hanzo Shimada, Genji's older brother. There had only been a couple of photos depicting him in his file, and they did not do him justice.

 

He was gorgeous. Where Genji still had a slightly round face and bright, big eyes, Hanzo was all sharp angles and piercing gaze, more adult than a teenager. His silky black hair was drawn back in a ponytail, his clothing immaculate, his pose regal and his shoulders tense. He did not look happy with his little brother, and he barely even glanced at Jesse, which allowed him to stare as much as he liked. Jesse took him all in; his thin lips drawn down in a scowl, the dragon tattoo on his arm peeking out underneath his robe, his silhouette hinting at a solid body with well defined muscles, the sleek column of his pale throat disappearing beneath fabric.

 

Jesse swallowed.

 

He wanted him. More so than Genji; more so than _anyone_ he could remember ever desiring. He wanted to see what Hanzo looked like naked. He wanted to know what kind of noises he would make when touched in all the right spots. He wanted to know what he would look like when he came.

 

Genji said something else in Japanese, and Hanzo answered him with short, sharp sentences. Finally, Genji sighed, rolling his eyes and turning back to Jesse. Genji just looked at him for a moment, and then a small smile came to his lips.

 

“I have to go”, he said.

 

“Aight.” Jesse removed his arm from around Genji's shoulders, not wanting to offend the heir of the Shimada clan, and suddenly not as keen on trying to get Genji into his bed anymore.

 

“Sorry”, Genji added, leaning forward to place a chaste kiss on Jesse's cheek. “Will you be here again tomorrow?” he asked. Jesse couldn't help but smile.

 

“If ya want me to”, he said. He would rather want to meet Hanzo again, but he knew that would never happen. If he couldn't get one Shimada he'd settle for another, a thought that sent a wave of guilt through him.

 

Before Genji could answer, Hanzo said something again. Genji turned to him and replied, sounding like he was complaining. Finally, he turned back to Jesse again.

 

“I'd like that”, he said, a mischievous tone in his voice now.

 

Genji hurried to stand, padding over to his brother, who had already turned around to walk away. Before leaving, Genji looked over his shoulder and raised a hand as a goodbye to Jesse, who returned it. He sunk back into the sofa, alone, watching the two Shimada brothers disappear. One he liked and could probably get into bed without any difficulties, and one he craved with a burning desire and would never even get close to.

 

* * *

 

 

Jesse ran into the brothers again the following day, though not entirely by coincidence. He had been wandering around not too far away from the Shimada estate, not just looking out for them but any other Shimadas as well, and any suspicious activity. He hadn't seen much, unsurprisingly, as the clan had been doing this for quite some time and knew how to do it stealthily.

 

He spotted Genji and Hanzo heading out from one of the smaller side gates, heading down the street towards where Jesse was leaning against the side of a building, and did his best to act natural. It was slightly amusing seeing the two brothers side by side; Hanzo was calm and collected, his pose straight and his gaze fixed straight ahead. Genji was bouncing, seemingly undisturbed by any kind of hangover, grinning and chatting while looking all around. After a beat, his gaze fell on Jesse, and his face lit up in a smile.

 

“Hello Jesse!” he said once he got closer.

 

“Howdy”, Jesse replied, smiling and tipping his hat in greeting. Hanzo looked annoyed about his brother stopping to speak to a tourist and said nothing. Jesse could help but let his gaze linger on him again, tracing the contours of his face and appreciating the curve of his lips.

 

“Were you looking for us?” Genji wondered, giving him a sly smirk.

 

“Naw, I jus' wanted to have a look at the castle there”, Jesse explained, feigning ignorance.

 

“It is not a castle”, Hanzo said, the first time Jesse had heard him speak in English. He looked down the street, not meeting Jesse's surprised gaze, and said something else in Japanese. Genji answered, sounding weary, and then Hanzo started walking away without looking back.

 

“I apologize for my brother”, Genji sighed, turning back to Jesse once Hanzo had disappeared. “It is difficult for him to make new friends.”

 

Jesse couldn't help but chuckle.

 

“Naw, don't worry 'bout it”, he said, hooking his thumbs into his belt. “Bet he's real nice once ya get to know 'im.”

 

“You want him.”

 

The statement took Jesse completely by surprise and for a moment he couldn't do anything but stare at Genji's knowing smile. Jesse felt a heat rise to his face.

 

“Naw, I don't – I mean –“ he stammered, fully well knowing that he was rapidly making a fool of himself.

 

“I can see it in your eyes”, Genji continued, voice slightly raised to make himself heard over Jesse's stuttering. Jesse forced himself to shut up and took a deep breath. At least Genji didn't look mad about it. “I have never seen anyone look at my brother the way you do.”

 

Jesse hung his head, ashamed and embarrassed about the way he had acted.

 

“Sorry”, he said. To his surprise, Genji chuckled.

 

“I don't mind.” He reached out and took hold of Jesse's chin, gently forcing his head up until their eyes met. “You're sweet and funny, but I don't think you're quite my type.”

 

Jesse couldn't help but smile a little, oddly relieved. He could tell by the look in Genji's eyes that he was telling the truth.

 

“Think I'm his type?” he wondered, referring to Hanzo. Genji laughed, loud and true, making Jesse's cheeks heat up again.

 

“I'm not sure my brother has a type.” Genji crossed his arms and simply looked at him for a moment. “But I think someone like you would be good for him. Someone to make him loosen up a bit.” Jesse swallowed, a thrill of hope spiraling down into his stomach, which Genji no doubt noticed judging by his grin. “Would you like to meet him again? Properly, this time.”

 

“Yeah”, Jesse admitted. “I'd like that.”

 

“Good. I'm going to a restaurant tonight with some friends. I can't guarantee Hanzo will come along, but I will do my best to convince him. Would you like to join us?”

 

“Yeah sure, if that's okay.” In all honesty, he couldn't believe this was happening. “Are you sure it's okay?”

 

“Yes.” Genji chuckled again. “Trust me. It will be fun.”

 

* * *

 

 

Jesse wished he had some nicer clothes he could wear, since he had no idea what type of restaurant he was going to. In the end he had settled for a clean shirt, which he had actually ironed in his motel room. He had even cleaned off the worst stains from his jeans, washed his hair and shaved off the rough stubble covering his cheeks. Looking at himself in the mirror, he had to admit he looked pretty decent.

 

That's when he knew he got it bad.

 

He tried not to think about it too much when he headed into the restaurant Genji had pointed out to him earlier during the day; he tried to not hope that Hanzo would be there, as he knew it was a slim chance.

 

His heart took a leap when his eyes settled on both of the Shimada brothers sitting side by side at a large table in the corner of the restaurant, surrounded by other young men and women who were clearly more friends with Genji than with Hanzo. None of them were wearing particularly fancy clothes, and the restaurant itself seemed pretty relaxed, which made Jesse feel a bit better about his choice of clothing.

 

He grinned as he approached them, and Genji waved a little towards him. There was an empty seat between the brothers which Genji gestured too, and Jesse sat down there despite Hanzo's disapproving look.

 

“Howdy”, Jesse greeted, touching the brim of his hat, which made some of the people smirk and snicker. He didn't particularly care.

 

“Hello again”, Genji said, obviously pleased to see him. Hanzo was less so. He looked past Jesse towards his brother and said something in Japanese, which Genji answered. After, Hanzo gave Jesse a brief look.

 

“Good evening.”

 

“Hey”, Jesse breathed, stomach fluttering. Next to him, Genji snickered, and he could feel his face heat up again.

 

The food and drinks were traditional Japanese things that Jesse didn't know the names of and butchered the pronunciation of whenever someone in his company tried to teach him. They laughed at him more than once, especially when he tried to eat with his chopsticks and failed miserably, and when he accidentally ate too much of something which was too spicy for him and ended up completely red in the face. He didn't mind it that much, especially not when he glanced to his side and saw a tiny, amused smile on Hanzo's face. His heart skipped a beat at the sight.

 

The company mostly spoke in Japanese, save for some stray questions in English directed at Jesse, presumably mostly to be polite towards him. As they all drank more and more, they seemed to forget about Jesse and focus more on each other instead, leaving Jesse uncharacteristically quiet as he had no one to speak to.

 

Looking to his side again, he found Hanzo sitting silently, chopsticks in hand, looking at his unfinished food with a solemn expression. Jesse glanced at his glass; he hadn't been drinking as much as the others, just like Jesse.

 

“Hey”, he couldn't help but say, drawing Hanzo's attention. “You okay?”

 

“What?” Hanzo frowned.

 

“I said, are you okay?” Jesse repeated, leaning a bit closer, giving him a gentle smile. Hanzo just stared at him like he didn't understand the question. “Seems like somethin's wrong.”

 

“… I am fine”, Hanzo finally said.

 

“This ain't really yer type o' thing, is it?”

 

For a moment, Hanzo looked like he was considering to not actually answer, but then he sighed.

 

“No”, he admitted, looking away. And then, quietly: “I do not understand how he does it.”

 

“Well… yer different. Jus' the way it is”, Jesse said, heart suddenly aching for the other. A twenty-something heir to a criminal empire with no friends, quietly suffering through a dinner because his social brother thought it was a good idea to drag him along. “… You wanna go somewhere else?”

 

Hanzo looked up at him again, suspicion in his eyes now.

 

“Like where?”

 

“Wherever you want”, Jesse offered.

 

For quite a while, Hanzo just looked at him, as if he was reading him. Jesse swallowed and met his gaze as best he could, focusing on the gorgeous warm brown color of his eyes, trying to look as honest as he could. He still wanted Hanzo; just sitting his close to him made his body feel electric, every nerve buzzing in anticipation, but somewhere along the line he had started to want more than that. To listen to him. Comfort him. Make him feel like he wasn't alone.

 

Finally, Hanzo broke the eye contact.

 

“Fine”, he said, somewhere halfway between annoyed and relieved.

 

He pushed his chair back from the table and abruptly stood up, making everyone look his way. Hanzo said something in Japanese, a thin, polite smile on his lips, before leaving the table and heading for the exit. Jesse hurried to follow him, thanking Genji and the others for having him; before he left Genji gave him a knowing little smile and waggled his eyebrows suggestively. Jesse couldn't help but grin as he caught up with Hanzo outside the restaurant.

 

“So, where are we goin'?” he asked.

 

“I have not yet decided.”

 

Despite his words, Hanzo started walking down the street, Jesse settling at his side. They walked at a leisurely pace, silent among all the other people who were out. A lot of them wore traditional Japanese clothes in every color; some of them wore masks as well and a lot of them were holding different kinds of food purchased from the vendors along the street. The sun had set and the sky was dark, but the streets were lit up by hundreds of thousands of lanterns. The air smelled sweet and reminded Jesse of the carnivals back in America.

 

He was just about to ask Hanzo if it was some kind of festival going on when he discovered that the other was no longer by his side. Freezing in place, Jesse whipped around to spot him among the crowd. For a brief, terrifying moment he thought he had lost him, but then he saw a familiar ponytail and clothing between two stalls. Hanzo slipped out of sight in an instant, but Jesse was determined and set after him without hesitating.

 

Hanzo didn't get very far before Jesse caught up with him. Jesse reached out and grabbed a hold of his sleeve, making him gasp and turn around, clearly shocked that he had been found.

 

“Hey now, are you runnin' away from me?” Jesse wondered. He forced a smile, even though it hurt a little. He had known rejection before, but it still stung. For a moment, Hanzo just looked at him, surprise still written across his face, before he grew solemn again.

 

“Forgive me”, he said. Jesse slowly let go of his sleeve. “That was childish of me.”

 

“Look. If ya don't want me ta stick 'round then I won't. But tell me, okay? Don't just run off.”

 

“… I apologize.”

 

Neither of them said anything for a moment. Jesse watched Hanzo's face, trying to read his expression. If he were to guess, he would've said Hanzo couldn't decide whether he wanted Jesse to stay or not. Maybe he hadn't expected Jesse to follow him.

 

“I'll let you make it up to me”, Jesse suggested. Hanzo raised an eyebrow. “Take me to yer favorite place.”

 

“Why?”

 

“'Cause I wanna see it.” Jesse smiled and did his best puppy-dog-eyes. An amused smile came over Hanzo's lips, and he huffed.

 

“Fine”, he said, rolling his eyes. Jesse's grin widened.

 

They continued walking down the street side by side again, still in silence, though it felt different this time. After a minute or two, Jesse couldn't resist taking Hanzo by the arm, pulling him a bit closer. Hanzo looked from his hand to his face, clearly offended, an expression on his face which made Jesse chuckle.

 

“So ya won't run away from me again”, he explained.

 

Hanzo sighed but didn't try to pull away, making Jesse's heart flutter. He lead him with sure steps down streets filled with people until the crowd started to disperse more and more, leaving behind the chatter and the noise. The air was cool and clear and again Jesse felt so _alive_ , walking down near empty streets after dark arm in arm with his mark and unexpected sweetheart.

 

It didn't take long before they arrived.

 

It was a traditional Japanese garden, seemingly big enough to be a park. There were smooth stepping stones snaking through well kept trees, bushes and patches of flowers; in some places there was nothing covering the ground except white gravel, raked into intricate swirls and patterns. Through the branches and leaves, Jesse spotted a pond with a small waterfall, an archway and at least two gazebos tucked away amidst the greenery. The lanterns were few and far between, giving the garden an almost dreamlike mood.

 

“It's beautiful”, Jesse said, voice low as it felt wrong to speak too loudly in a place such as this.

 

Hanzo didn't say anything, but instead continued leading him down a small path, their feet padding against the stone and the gentle sound of flowing water the only noises disturbing the silence. They came to a gazebo, a pointed square roof on four pillars, with two benches underneath. There was a lantern nearby, spreading a soft yellow glow over the scene.

 

Jesse let go of Hanzo as he sat down on one of the benches with a sigh, Jesse following him and sitting down at a respectable distance.

 

“… This is my favorite spot”, Hanzo said after a brief pause. He had closed his eyes and appeared to be breathing deeply. Jesse watched him for a moment or two, taking in his beauty in the dim light. “I come here sometimes to meditate. When I cannot find peace at home.”

 

He opened his eyes again and met Jesse's gaze. For a few seconds, they sat still and silently, simply watching each other. Finally, Hanzo raised his chin slightly, almost like a dare.

 

“Now what?” he wanted to know.

 

Jesse's mouth had gone dry. He swallowed and licked his lips, which Hanzo no doubt noticed. There was something in his eyes which hadn't been there before. Desire? Jesse took a deep breath.

 

“Talk to me”, he said.

 

“What?” Hanzo frowned slightly, clearly taken aback.

 

“Talk to me”, Jesse repeated, smiling a little this time.

 

“About what?”

 

“Anything. Everything.”

 

“Why?” Hanzo asked.

 

“'Cause you seem like you need someone to talk to”, Jesse said, truthfully. He watched Hanzo's stoic face slowly crumble, leaving behind something painfully young and vulnerable. After a beat, Hanzo turned his face away, hiding his reaction, as if he was afraid of showing too much. Jesse's heart ached at the sight. “Hey, now”, he said, tenderly. He couldn't resist reaching out and gently touch Hanzo's hand; he jerked a little at the contact but didn't pull away. “Look, I ain't no one special. You got no reason to tell me, but you got no reason not to either. I'm leavin' again in a couple of days and I ain't never comin' back. You can tell me whatever the hell you want and no one will ever know.”

 

He already knew deep in his heart that whatever Hanzo told him would never make it into his report.

 

Hanzo was quiet for a long time, so long Jesse began wondering if it was best he just left, but then he slowly started talking.

 

He told Jesse about his brother, about Genji, how they had been best friends when they were small and how they had both changed over the years. How Hanzo was forced to be mature and adult while Genji could spend his time in leisure, slacking off and doing whatever he enjoyed. How Genji had changed even more after their mother died, and how their father had changed too.

 

He told Jesse about his practice; archery, martial arts and sword combat, and how he excelled at all of it and never earned any praise for it. It was simply expected of him. When he started speaking about the family business and what he had to do and make other people do, he became vague in his descriptions and stopped himself before saying any names, which Jesse couldn't blame him for.

 

He told Jesse how he was afraid of what the future might bring, a fear he had never told anyone; a fear he had never been allowed to tell anyone. He was afraid of what would happen when his father died. He was afraid of what would happen between him and his brother. He was afraid of what he might be forced to do as the new leader of the clan. He was afraid, because he was afraid.

 

Jesse listened and said nothing, squeezing Hanzo's hand whenever his voice grew strained and pretended not to see when Hanzo's eyes threatened to spill over.

 

Finally, Hanzo fell silent.

 

They sat together without talking for a while, listening to the crickets chirping in the bushes and the murmur of the waterfall nearby.

 

“I'm sorry”, Jesse eventually said, the only thing he could think of to say. Hanzo let out a shaky breath, his slender fingers moving against Jesse's.

 

He turned his head to look up at Jesse, who felt a jolt down into his stomach at how emotional Hanzo's eyes were. Hanzo reached up and placed a hand on Jesse's cheek, his thumb rubbing against his skin.

 

“Thank you”, Hanzo quietly said. Jesse's mouth went dry again.

 

Before he could speak or think or do anything, Hanzo had covered the space between them and pressed their lips together in a soft kiss. Jesse melted into it, closing his eyes, unable to stop a little noise tearing from his throat. _Hanzo_ kissed _him_. Not the other way around.

 

After a beat, Hanzo leaned back again and Jesse could hear him take a shaky breath. Suddenly bold, Jesse moved forward and kissed him again, drawing a surprised sound from Hanzo's lips, but he didn't move away. Jesse did his best to keep the kiss sweet, innocent, even though he wanted to push for more; Hanzo seemed to like the tenderness, craving the languid, thorough movements of Jesse's lips against his own. There was something achingly desperate about the way Hanzo's hand dropped to grip at Jesse's shirt, keeping him in place, and the strangled noises escaping his lips.

 

Jesse moved back for a moment to breathe; this close he could feel Hanzo's scent, something sharp and flowery, like soap. He leaned closer again.

 

“Darlin'”, he whispered against Hanzo's lips. “Sweetheart.”

 

He could feel Hanzo's mouth curve up into a smile and a moment later he wound his arms around Jesse's shoulders, drawing him closer and deepening the kiss. Jesse moaned without being able to stop himself. He wrapped his arms around Hanzo's waist, pulling him close enough that he almost ended up in his lap, which made Hanzo gasp and then chuckle, a dark sound deep in his throat that sent a jolt of desire straight down into the pit of Jesse's stomach. A moment later, Hanzo's hands were in his hair, carding through the newly washed tangles, making his hat pop off his head and sail down onto the ground.

 

He didn't know how long they sat like that; it didn't feel like it mattered. All that mattered was the silent, dark night around them, soft lips brushing, hands on waists and shoulders and in hair, and sweet words dropped by Jesse as soon as he got a moment to breathe.

 

“Honey. Darlin'”, Jesse said, huffing, leaning back for a moment to catch his breath. In the dim light from the lanterns he could tell Hanzo's face was darker than normal, flushed with want. “Sweetheart o' mine.”

 

Hanzo huffed, amused. Jesse pulled a him again, this time just to hold him close; Hanzo nuzzled against his neck, his hot breath washing over his skin. Jesse buried his nose in Hanzo's hair and drew in the scent of it. For a minute or two they sat still, allowing breaths and heart rates to return to normal, soaking in the moment.

 

“I can see why my brother enjoys this so much”, Hanzo finally said.

 

Jesse grinned at first, but it quickly faded at a sudden thought: was this Hanzo's first kiss? Surely, it couldn't be. Was it? Curiosity gnawed at him, but he wasn't about to ask; it seemed too personal.

 

After a beat, Hanzo leaned back and looked up at him, determination in his eyes.

 

“Are you staying at a hotel?” he wondered. Jesse swallowed, a chill running down his spine.

 

“Uh. Yeah.”

 

“We should go there.”

 

Jesse shifted, desire tugging at him, making his dick twitch. Still, he hesitated.

 

“Are ya sure? I mean… if this is, uh…”

 

“I am certain”, Hanzo said, a small smile curving his lips, but then quickly disappearing again. “That is, if it is what you want –“

 

“Oh, I want to, darlin', trust me”, Jesse blurted, maybe a bit too enthusiastically, because Hanzo huffed at him again. Jesse felt his cheeks heat up but continued anyway. “I want you”, he admitted. “All of you. You're beautiful. Goddamn gorgeous. I ain't never met anyone like you before.”

 

Hanzo stood up without saying anything, but his expression was gentle. He bent down to pick up the hat and then placed it on Jesse's head, making him grin. After that, Hanzo stretched out his hand for Jesse to take, which he did, standing up as well. Their fingers interlaced and Jesse's stomach did a backflip. This was happening. It was real.

 

“Come on, _cowboy_.”

 

Jesse just about melted.

 

It turned out Hanzo had to find the way back to Jesse's motel, as he hadn't been paying attention to the streets on their way to the garden and was slightly lost. They held hands for a while, Jesse absentmindedly rubbing his thumb over Hanzo's skin, but as soon as they started encountering people, Hanzo let go. Jesse couldn't blame him and didn't bother him about it; even though Genji was more popular, Hanzo was still famous enough that people would recognize him walking down the street. It wasn't strange that he didn't want to be seen holding hands with some American tourist. It was a one night thing after all, and they both knew it.

 

If Hanzo was let down by the sight of Jesse's 'hotel' he didn't show it. It was a cheap thing, a motel rather than a hotel, but even so it wasn't greasy and dark like its American counterparts. Here everything was bright and well cleaned, sheets fresh and pillows fluffy, even though the room was rather cramped.

 

Jesse closed the door behind them after showing Hanzo into his room, his heart pounding all the way up into his throat. If Hanzo was nervous he didn't show it. Jesse considered turning on the ceiling light, but the lamp by the bed was on, creating a pleasantly dim atmosphere. If he turned on the light he was pretty sure he'd just ruin the mood.

 

“So, uh…” Jesse begun, aimlessly gesturing. “Can I get ya anythin'? Got a minibar and I'm pretty sure there's –“

 

“No thank you”, Hanzo said. He turned to face Jesse, his eyes serious. “I just want you.”

 

Jesse had to take a deep breath to steady himself. He managed a weak nod, and then took a step forward, placing his trembling hands on Hanzo's hips and pulling him closer. Their foreheads touched, and then their noses; they simply looked at each other for a moment.

 

“Goddamn”, Jesse couldn't help but whisper. “I've never wanted anyone like I do you. You're somethin' else, you know that? You're like a dream.” He could see Hanzo's expression softening, his eyes going tender; he greedily drank up every single sweet word that left Jesse's lips, craving the affection, the affirmation, the attention. Jesse gladly gave it to him. “I wish we could've met under different circumstances. I wish I could've gotten to be with you longer. I wish I could've gotten to know you. I wish I could be by your side, always.”

 

Hanzo finally let out a breath, looking away, as if it was too much. Jesse fell silent and instead let his head drop, kissing Hanzo's cheek, and then his jawline, and then his neck. Hanzo squirmed and then let out a breathless snicker, breaking the tension.

 

“Aw, you're ticklish”, Jesse said, grinning at the realization.

 

“Your beard”, Hanzo explained, thumbing his soul patch. Jesse leaned forward and gave him a sweet kiss.

 

“How you wanna do this?” he wondered. A brief look of confusion went across Hanzo's face, followed by a pink tint to his cheeks.

 

“What do you mean?” Hanzo asked, even though Jesse could tell he knew exactly what Jesse was asking. He couldn't help but grin.

 

“What I'm sayin' is that we can do this any way ya want. I ain't got no preference. It's your choice.”

 

The blush on Hanzo's face deepened and he averted his eyes, a smile curving his lips. He was silent for a moment and then looked up at Jesse again, the determination back in his eyes.

 

“I want to fuck you”, he said. Jesse prickled, the hairs in the back of his neck standing up, lust seeping down and pooling in the pit of his stomach. He knew he was getting hard already, just thinking about it.

 

“Aw, hell”, he managed, weakly. He saw the hesitation in Hanzo's eyes and immediately, albeit breathlessly, added: “Yeah. Sure. That's – I'd like that. I want that.”

 

Kissing felt a bit awkward after that, like they both knew it was a prelude leading up to something else, but Jesse quickly got over it, throwing himself into it wholeheartedly. He licked and nibbled and sucked at Hanzo's lips, slipping his tongue past them and relishing the noises he drew from Hanzo at each slow movement. Hanzo's hands sneaked up into his hair again, and again the hat fell off, making both of them grin and snicker against each others lips, excited and nervous and a bit embarrassed.

 

After a beat, Jesse tightened his hold on Hanzo and gingerly started moving towards the bed. He could hear Hanzo's breath hitch and stopped to make sure he was okay. Hanzo's eyes were dark with desire, his lips glistening and mouth hanging open, silently begging for more. Jesse murmured a low curse and kissed him again, drawing a moan from him.

 

They got onto the bed together, lips barely leaving each other, Hanzo reclining against the pillows, Jesse hovering above him. He couldn't keep his hands to himself anymore; he tugged at the belt holding together Hanzo's kimono, easing him out of his clothes. His hands slid across smooth, warm skin and well defined muscles; he looked down and saw the dragon's tail peeking out over Hanzo's pectoral. Jesse drew back his hands for a moment as Hanzo pulled down his kimono completely, freeing his arms and tossing the garment aside. It hit the floor with a _thump_ that sent a shiver down Jesse's spine.

 

Jesse caught Hanzo's hand, grinning at the sight of the whole tattoo. He brought Hanzo's hand up to his mouth, kissing the dragon's head, making Hanzo smile, amused. Jesse moved up, letting his lips slide across Hanzo's skin, kissing the dragon's belly, its talons, the dark thunder clouds, the golden streaks of lightning. He came up to Hanzo's shoulder and then dropped down again towards his chest. He couldn't resist; he licked against Hanzo's pink nipple and then sucked at it, feeling it stiffen underneath his tongue. Hanzo let out a noise, something close to a moan.

 

Suddenly there was a fist in Jesse's hair, pulling his head back, making him draw in a sharp breath.

 

“Stop that”, Hanzo said, even though his cheeks were flushed and he had clearly been enjoying it.

 

“Sorry, darlin'”, Jesse apologized, complying and settling for unbuttoning his own shirt instead, the hand in his hair disappearing. Hanzo helped with the undressing, his hands ghosting across Jesse's chest and stomach, fingers curling into the dark hairs. Exploring him, Jesse realized; they were so different. Where he was tan and hairy Hanzo was pale and smooth; he was loud and handsy, Hanzo was quiet and restrained.

 

Jesse's pants came off next, and there was no way he could hide his hard dick pressing against the fabric of his underwear. Hanzo didn't touch him, not yet, like he was afraid to, or shy. Jesse slid his hand up against the inside of Hanzo's thigh, making him gasp; he could feel Hanzo's dick twitch through his pants. Jesse planted his face against Hanzo's stomach, kissing the trail of fine, dark hairs leading downwards and then hooked his fingers underneath the hem of his pants, slowly pulling them down.

 

Hanzo squirmed under his touch, breath coming in short gasps. Jesse pulled back for a moment, again checking that what was happening was okay. A hand fondly coming through his hair told him that it was, and he leaned in to kiss Hanzo again.

 

There was a low noise coming from him when Jesse drew back, a hesitation. Jesse met Hanzo's eyes and raised his eyebrows in a silent question.

 

“Ah… condoms?” Hanzo wondered, his face red again, his expression far too sweet for such a wanton question.

 

“Uh, yeah, sure. Of course”, Jesse said, breaking out into a grin.

 

He pulled back and straightened up, climbing off the bed again and heading for his bag sitting on a drawer. He rummaged through it until he could find a couple of foil packages and some lube. To be fair, he didn't get a lot of action in his line of work, but that didn't mean he wasn't prepared for it when it did happen. He wasn't dumb.

 

When he got back into bed he lay down onto his back instead, drawing Hanzo up on top of him, which made him blush even harder. Jesse smoothed his hand over Hanzo's cheek and then couldn't resist going a bit farther, tugging at the ponytail until it came loose, long strands of silky black hair falling down around Hanzo's face.

 

“Goddamn gorgeous”, Jesse murmured, again, but he couldn't help himself. “Darlin'. I want you.”

 

“You have said so already”, Hanzo replied, obviously amused as well as flattered. Jesse grinned at him.

 

“Well, I still mean it.” He spread his legs, pulling Hanzo closer. “Give it to me.” He knew he was being shameless, lewd; he didn't care. He could see Hanzo got off on it. Hell, he got off on it too.

 

Since Hanzo still appeared to be hesitating a bit, Jesse took matter into his own hands and pulled down his underwear, his hard dick springing free. There was a noise from Hanzo, something halfway between a moan and a sigh. Jesse moved his hands to remove Hanzo's underwear as well; it took a bit of shuffling in getting them off, but finally he was fully naked as well. Unashamed, Jesse looked; he was decently sized, hard and red from arousal already. Jesse's mouth watered at the sight of it. He couldn't decide what he wanted the most; to fuck him or to be fucked by him, give him a blowjob or received a blowjob from him; but they had already decided which way it would be, and he wasn't about to shy away from that.

 

Jesse had to gently tug at Hanzo to make him move in between Jesse's thighs, on all four above him now, breathing irregular and eyes glazed over. Jesse hadn't expected him to react like this, to just completely loose his cool as soon as they got into bed. He hushed at him and slid his fingers through his hair, soothing him, bringing him even closer. Finally they came together, hips slotting against each other, warm skin grinding against warm skin, fingers tangling, soft moans filling the space between them. Stretching up, Jesse kissed Hanzo's neck and nibbled at the lobe of his ear, whispering sweet encouragements to him.

 

After a beat he pressed the bottle of lube into Hanzo's hand; he took it even though his fingers were trembling. There was a brief pause, and then Jesse could feel a single, slick finger pressing against his entrance, silently asking for permission. Jesse dropped his head backwards with a sigh, grinning and nodding. The finger slid inside of him, gently probing, pulling back a bit and then pushing in again. Jesse cracked open one eye and saw how Hanzo was watching him, wide-eyed, cheeks flushed, drinking in the sight of Jesse lying submissive underneath him.

 

Another finger came next and this time it stretched a bit, but it was nothing Jesse couldn't handle. He lay back and relaxed, fully content with letting Hanzo take the lead, slowly pushing him open more and more. He was tentative but deliberate; Jesse could tell Hanzo paid close attention to the noises and the faces he was making, and it just made him want him even more.

 

Finally, just when Jesse felt like he was about to come from Hanzo fingering him alone, Hanzo removed his hand and then moved his hips closer instead. Jesse caught Hanzo by the nape of his neck and pulled him down for a kiss. They moved apart nothing but an inch, eyes meeting just as Hanzo pushed into Jesse, making him moan. Hanzo made a noise too, something between a groan and a whimper, dropping his head and burying his face into Jesse's neck and breathing hard against his skin. He continued pushing until all of him was inside Jesse, and then paused for a moment to let both of them adjust and accommodate to what was happening.

 

“Darlin'”, Jesse whispered against the shell of Hanzo's ear. He tried moving a bit and heard a strangled noise from Hanzo, which made him grin. He wrapped his legs around Hanzo's waist, sliding his heel down his back. “Move for me, will ya?”

 

Hanzo complied and started moving, gently rocking back and forth, hips stuttering and pace irregular. In all honesty, it wasn't that good. Hanzo seemed to be struggling along, barely keeping a good rhythm, his shoulders trembling beneath Jesse's touch, like it was already too much for him. Like he hadn't done it before.

 

He was a virgin, Jesse suddenly realized, an epiphany that thundered through him and made him draw in a sharp breath. Or had been a virgin. Or was, but wouldn't remain one for much longer judging by the sounds he was making. That explained a lot. Maybe that hadn't been his first kiss earlier, but this was definitely the first time he was naked in bed with someone else.

 

Jesse pressed his face against Hanzo's shoulder, combing his fingers through his hair, overcome by affection for the other. He called him darling, and then sweetheart, and then darling again. He heard something like a breathless chuckle from Hanzo.

 

To make it easier for both of them, Jesse shifted a bit and then started rolling his hips against Hanzo's, helping him find a good pace that made them both moan and shudder. Hanzo started getting into it, more determined now, rougher, like he was losing himself into it. Jesse could feel himself nearing the edge and hung on for dear life, still moving as best he could against Hanzo's dick.

 

It didn't take much longer before he came. It was good, not great, but good, making him arch his back and let out a breathless laugh, his seed spilling over his stomach. Hanzo groaned and shuddered, and it took a moment before Jesse realized that he had come as well, his face still shoved into the juncture between Jesse's neck and shoulder. Jesse wished he could've seen Hanzo's face as he came, but he was satisfied just knowing that he had reached his peak. He let his body relax against the soft mattress, cracking his eyes open to check on Hanzo.

 

He was still moving a bit, gently thrusting like his body didn't want to stop. Jesse smoothed his hands over Hanzo's back and unhooked his legs from around his waist, pulling back a bit in an attempt to get a glimpse of his face.

 

“Hanzo? Darlin'?” he murmured, pressing a kiss against Hanzo's shoulder. A low grunt. “You okay?” A hum; one that sent a pleasant shiver through Jesse's body. Hanzo was still deep inside of him. “You need a moment?”

 

Hanzo hushed at him, which made him chuckle. After a beat he went completely still, breathing deeply, sinking further down onto Jesse with each exhale. Jesse made a pleased noise and wrapped his arms around Hanzo, content to just lie there with Hanzo on top of him.

 

He hoped it had been good for him; there was no doubt this hadn't been the way Hanzo had imagined his first time, but Jesse hoped he had enjoyed it anyway. Hoped it had been special for him, just like it had been special for Jesse.

 

A quiet moment passed, and Jesse could feel his hips starting to ache from the strain of being in the same position for too long. Hanzo was growing slack inside of him, not filling him up as much as he had a minute ago. Just as Jesse was about to tell him it was maybe time to move, Hanzo heaved a sigh and pulled out, making him moan a little at the sense of loss. Jesse lowered his legs slowly and saw through half-lidded eyes how Hanzo removed the condom and tossed it in the trash bin next to the bed. He kept his flushed face turned away, eyes averted. Jesse felt a pang of worry.

 

“Hey”, he said, reaching out to touch his thigh, his side, his back. “Darlin'.”

 

Hanzo sighed again and then sunk down onto the bed next to him, hiding his face from Jesse.

 

“I apologize”, Hanzo mumbled.

 

“For what?” Jesse couldn't help but grin. “Darlin', it was good. It was good.” He kissed Hanzo's shoulder and brushed away his hair, revealing one dark eye cautiously peering up at him. “Was it good fer you?”

 

Hanzo's eye closed halfway and Jesse could tell he was smiling, little crinkles showing by the corner of his eye.

 

“Yes”, he admitted.

 

“Good. Then come here.”

 

Jesse tugged at him until Hanzo allowed him to wrap his arms around him, drawing him close and pulling the covers around them. Hanzo settled against him with a sigh, his head resting on Jesse's chest.

 

“I should go”, he said, weakly.

 

“You should stay”, Jesse replied, gently. Hanzo didn't protest.

 

* * *

 

 

Thanks to his line of work, Jesse had developed the uncanny ability to tell himself exactly when to wake up. If he wanted to sleep for two hours between missions, he did, and if he wanted to wake up at exactly five o' clock in the morning to get a head start on his mark, he did. Today he chose to wake up at half past six; he didn't doubt Hanzo was the type who had to get up really early in the morning, and Jesse wanted to be awake when he came to.

 

Hanzo had slept soundly next to him throughout the entire night. Jesse hadn't been too worried that he would get up and leave in the middle of the night; he seemed genuinely exhausted. Maybe it wasn't just physical exhaustion, but emotional as well.

 

He was still asleep, breathing slow and steady, one of his hands resting on Jesse's chest. Jesse just lay still and watched him for a long time, marveling at him. He was even more gorgeous in the morning light, face relaxed by sleep. Jesse reached up and softly traced the lines of his brow, his cheekbones, his jaw and his lips with a single finger. He wasn't sure he'd call it love at first sight, but it was damn close.

 

It didn't take that long before Hanzo woke up. He inhaled deeply, shifting slightly, making a small noise in the back of his throat. Jesse leaned down and kissed his cheek, which made him smile a little.

 

“Hey, gorgeous”, Jesse said, sliding his hand down Hanzo's back, drawing a pleased sigh from him. Hanzo didn't say anything for several minutes, just lay still and traced circles across Jesse's hairy chest.

 

“I am late for practice”, Hanzo finally announced, even though he made no attempt to rise from the bed.

 

“What kind?” Jesse wondered.

 

“Sword fighting. With my brother.”

 

“I think he'll understand”, Jesse said, truthfully. He thought about it for a moment. “Wouldn't surprise me if he's late too, if ya know what I mean.”

 

Hanzo huffed.

 

“That is true”, he agreed.

 

They lay together in silence for a while, simply enjoying each others company, enjoying the warmth underneath the sheets and the sensation of soft skin lazily brushing against each other.

 

Eventually, Hanzo spoke up again.

 

“We will never see each other again.”

 

“I know”, Jesse said, sighing. Perhaps Hanzo had expected him to say something else, because he didn't answer. Not wanting to end their meeting on such a solemn note, Jesse shifted and propped himself up onto his elbows, looking down at Hanzo with a grin. “Let's make the most of it, yeah?”

 

A smile tugged at Hanzo's lips, and he reached up to fondly brush his fingers through Jesse's hair.

 

“What do you have in mind?”

 

“Whatever you want, darlin'.” He watched as the pink tint returned to Hanzo's cheeks. He could tell Hanzo knew exactly what he wanted, but he could also tell that Hanzo was embarrassed to admit it. “C'mon, tell me.” Jesse slid down a little and placed a trail of kisses across Hanzo's stomach, making him draw in a sharp breath. “Handjob? Blowjob?” He peered up at Hanzo, who was watching him with dark eyes. Hanzo swallowed, and a jolt of desire went down into Jesse's stomach. “Oh.” Jesse couldn't help but grin again. “You want me to fuck you?”

 

Hanzo closed his eyes with a sigh, his head dropping backwards, a smile that seemed almost relieved curving his lips. Jesse couldn't interpret that as anything but a yes.

 

He slid his hand down between Hanzo's legs, gently pawing at him, making him hum, pleased. Jesse loved the feeling of Hanzo growing in his hand, soft and silky at first, then harder and warmer, his foreskin moving back and forth, pulling back from the tip. Jesse was getting harder too, from just looking at him and from the anticipation. He stretched up and pressed their lips together. Hanzo threaded his fingers into Jesse's hair, holding him in place for a moment as they shared a tender, languid kiss.

 

Drawing back, Jesse reached for the lube and the condoms on the bedside table. He squeezed a good amount into his hand and then slid it in between Hanzo's legs again, finding his entrance and slowly circling a finger around it. Hanzo gasped and arched his back, bucking his hips up into Jesse's touch. Jesse licked his lips. He couldn't help himself. One hand pressing between Hanzo's butt cheeks, the other leisurely jerking him off; he bent down and took Hanzo's dick into his mouth. Hanzo moaned and so did Jesse; he could taste Hanzo's precum already, a bitter salty taste that turned him on like crazy. Hanzo's hands were in his hair again, clutching tight, like he was hanging on for dear life.

 

Jesse slid one finger inside Hanzo, making him gasp and buck his hips again. Jesse had to move away from his dick for a moment to take a breath, grinning at the apologetic look Hanzo shot him.

 

“It's fine, darlin'”, Jesse said, continuing to push into him, then pulling out, and then pushing back in again. “Yer fine. Sweetheart. Sweet darlin'. Honey.” Jesse closed his mouth around the tip of Hanzo's dick again, humming against it, swirling his tongue around. There was a faint noise from Hanzo and Jesse looked up, finding him close to snickering, grinning, like it felt so fucking good he didn't know what else to do with himself. Jesse moaned against Hanzo's dick, just to hear that snicker again.

 

Jesse inserted another finger and then slowly started stretching Hanzo open, watching his face closely for any signs of pain. There was none, only bliss. Hanzo shifted, sighing and moaning below him. Jesse was pretty sure he could come by just watching Hanzo like this, squirming underneath his touch.

 

“ _S-stop_ ”, Hanzo suddenly choked out, his voice shaky. Jesse immediately pulled back, both his fingers and his mouth. Hanzo let out a deep breath, body relaxing. Jesse hadn't realized how tense he had been.

 

“Sorry darlin', sweetheart, did I hurt ya? You okay?” Jesse hurried, almost tripping over the words in his haste to get them out.

 

Hanzo surprised him by letting out a breathless chuckle.

 

“I am fine. I, ah, I was close”, he said, rubbing his face with one hand. He cracked open one eye and glanced down at Jesse, who grinned at him.

 

Jesse moved up to kiss him and allow him a moment to calm down again.

 

“Doya like this?” he had to ask.

 

“Yes”, Hanzo replied, a soft sigh.

 

“Wanna keep goin'?”

 

“Yes.” Smiling now, a hint of mischief.

 

Jesse positioned himself between Hanzo's thighs again and slid his hands down his muscular legs. After putting on a condom he used his hand to guide himself into Hanzo, making him tense up at first, but then relax. Jesse took it slow, listening to the noises Hanzo made, whispering sweet words of encouragements to him. It felt better than he had ever imagined, slowly sinking deeper into Hanzo, who was warm and tight but willing, feeling completely enveloped by him.

 

Once he had fully slid into Hanzo he paused for a moment, making sure he was okay and kissing him gently. One of Hanzo's legs were trembling slightly, and Jesse placed his hands on Hanzo's thighs, pushing down a bit to make the angle of his hips better for him. It made Hanzo moan.

 

Jesse started moving, slowly at first but then quicker, encouraged by the sounds Hanzo made and the way he arched his back into Jesse's thrusts, begging for more. One of Hanzo's hands was wound around Jesse's neck, clutching at his back and probably leaving marks; the other was gripping the sheets tight, knuckles turning white. Jesse buried his face into Hanzo's neck and sucked at his skin, leaving a mark and making him moan. He was careful not to do it too far up, so that it would be hidden underneath his clothes, but he still wanted Hanzo to have something to remember him by for a couple of days.

 

Hanzo's moans grew louder, turned into cries, became desperate. Jesse rolled his hips and slammed himself into Hanzo over and over again, breathless, lost in the burning desire. The headboard banged against the wall, an oddly satisfying sound.

 

Jesse lifted his head just in time to see Hanzo come. There was a loud groan from him; his body shuddering and tensing, and Jesse could feel his come splattering over both of their stomachs. He was goddamn gorgeous when he came; cheeks flushed, mouth open in a desperate _o_ , eyes shut tight, eyebrows turned up in unspeakable ecstasy. Jesse came as well, hips stuttering, groaning against Hanzo's shoulder. He kept going for a while, slowing down, lazily moving his hips against Hanzo's, allowing both of them to enjoy it for as long as possible.

 

Only when he started getting too sensitive did he pull away, panting and trembling. He got rid of the condom and then flopped down onto the bed next to Hanzo, who was in a similar state. For a while, they just lay next to each other, breaths slowing and heart rates returning to normal. Jesse's legs were still twitching, his muscles snapping from relaxing after the exertion, a deep pool of satisfaction settling in his stomach.

 

After a minute or two Jesse glanced over at Hanzo and found that he had covered his face with his hands, breathing deeply. His stomach was still slick with come. Jesse reached down from the bed and picked up his discarded underwear, and then used them to wipe off Hanzo's stomach. Hanzo jerked a little at first, surprised, but then removed his hands from his face and looked up and Jesse with a tender expression.

 

“You okay?” Jesse wondered, softly, bending down to kiss the dragon's tail again. Hanzo's fingers slid through his hair.

 

“Yes”, he said. He tugged at Jesse until their lips met. Hanzo hummed against him. “That was good.”

 

“Yeah?” Jesse grinned. “Good.”

 

They curled up next to each other again, wrapping their arms around one another, exchanging sweet kisses and gentle touches. Jesse traced the lines of Hanzo's tattoo and kissed his neck.

 

He wasn't surprised when Hanzo was the one who got up out of bed first. He padded over to the bathroom and locked himself in, and a moment later Jesse could hear the shower running. Jesse turned over to his back and stared up at a crack in the ceiling. Knowing that it wouldn't last for much longer left a bittersweet taste in the back of his throat. He closed his eyes and tried his best to imprint the moment in his mind, remembering all the little details.

 

Hanzo was done in mere moments, coming back out again with a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair still dry. He slowly moved around the room, picking up his clothes and putting them back on, doing his best to smooth out any wrinkles. Jesse watched him in silence. Once Hanzo was almost done Jesse got out of bed as well, digging out a fresh pair of underwear from his bag and putting on a shirt, too tired to get properly dressed.

 

When Hanzo was done he looked almost like nothing had happened. There was still a certain softness to his features, a sadness in his eyes that stung at Jesse's heart. His hair was still let down, cascading down around his shoulders.

 

“Have you seen my ribbon?” Hanzo wondered, sounding weary.

 

Jesse rummaged around the crumpled sheets and pillows until he found it. He stretched it out towards Hanzo, but then changed his mind and pulled back his hand again. A slight frown came over Hanzo's face.

 

“Can I keep it?” Jesse asked, pressing the gold ribbon against his chest. He knew it would've been better if he didn't, but he couldn't help himself.

 

Surprise crossed Hanzo's face, followed by affection. He let out a sigh.

 

“Sure.”

 

Jesse smiled a little even though it felt like his heart was breaking into tiny little pieces. He got an idea and walked over to his bag, looking through it again until he found a red scarf.

 

“Here”, he said, holding it out to Hanzo. “Ya can have this instead.”

 

Hanzo reached out and took it from him.

 

“Thank you”, he said, quietly. He brought the scarf up to his face and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

 

It was too much for Jesse.

 

He covered the space between them in two long strides, wrapping Hanzo in his arms again and kissing him roughly. Hanzo moaned and yielded, kissing him back with equal force. Jesse broke away, breathing hard.

 

“Let's run away”, he said, unable to stop himself. There was a painful mix of amusement and longing in Hanzo's eyes. “Let's be dumb. Let's just leave it all behind. You an' me, darlin'. It'd be so good. We'd be so good. We don't need anyone else in the world.”

 

Jesse held his breath, waiting for an answer. He knew what it would be, and yet he couldn't help but hope. Hanzo let out a breath and dropped his forehead to rest on Jesse's shoulder.

 

“I cannot”, he said. His voice cracked halfway through the sentence.

 

Jesse tightened his hold on him and said nothing, heart breaking all over again.

 

For a while, they stood still, embracing each other. Finally, Hanzo drew away, and Jesse had to let him go. Their final kiss was sweet, lips barely brushing.

 

“I'll never forget you, darlin'”, Jesse said.

 

“I will not forget you either”, Hanzo replied.

 

* * *

 

 

When Jesse met Genji again, several years later, he was a different man. Where he had once been bouncy and cheerful, cheeky and sweet, he was now quiet and reserved, solemn and weary. It wasn't just his personality that had changed; so had his entire body. His face was more or less the only thing remaining of his physical appearance, and more often than not he hid it behind a mask. Jesse didn't need to ask to know what had happened; everyone at Overwatch knew. It made his heart hurt all over again, an ache he thought he had left far behind, in a motel room in Hanamura. He didn't ask about Hanzo either, the pain of not knowing surely better than the truth. Genji didn't mention him either, and barely spoke at all.

 

Many years later, after the recall, Jesse was surprised and pleased to learn that Genji had changed again. He still wasn't quite as vibrant as he had been when he was young, but he had a sense of calm and merriness about him now, like an echo of his youth. It was because of Zenyatta, Genji told him, the omnic monk who had accepted him as his student, teaching him to be one with the body he once hated. Now Genji told him about what had happened between him and his brother, in his own words. Jesse had been right; the pain of knowing was worse than the ignorance. But Genji persisted that he had forgiven Hanzo, and that all he wished was that Hanzo would forgive himself as well.

 

They were stationed at Watchpoint Gibraltar, a place that seemed both unfamiliar and familiar at the same time; the sensation of being back there odd but not entirely unpleasant. Overwatch was still being closely monitored by the United Nations, and only a handful agents were allowed to rejoin at a slow pace.

 

This was why Jesse became confused when Genji showed up at his door late one afternoon, claiming there was someone he wanted Jesse to meet. Perhaps it was the omnic monk, Jesse reflected as he followed Genji through the corridors of the base. He had never been properly introduced to Zenyatta, even though he had seen him plenty of times.

 

Genji took him to a currently unused part of the base, a balcony overlooking the empty training grounds. They rounded a corner and Jesse's steps faltered, his heart skipping a beat.

 

There was a man standing with his back turned, leaning against the railing of the balcony. He was dressed in traditional Japanese clothes in muted color, one sleeve pulled down, revealing an intricate dragon tattoo snaking up his muscular arm. His long black hair, streaked with silver, was tied up in a ponytail, a golden ribbon fluttering in the faint ocean breeze.

 

Genji said something in Japanese, and the man turned around.

 

Jesse watched the man's expression go from confusion to recognition to surprise and then to something else, something painfully vulnerable and honest.

 

“I'll leave you two alone”, Genji said. Jesse couldn't see his face behind the mask, but heard his smug tone. He wished he could've gotten some kind of warning before Genji had just thrown him into this. Genji sneaked away, his footsteps next to inaudible.

 

For a moment, Jesse couldn't do anything but stare at Hanzo, for once at a loss of words. He had thought Hanzo was handsome when he was young; it was nothing compared to now. He had aged like a fine wine.

 

Jesse took off his hat, humbled.

 

“Howdy, darlin'”, he finally managed, his voice a bit weaker than he thought.

 

Hanzo sharply turned around again. Jesse's heart stung in rejection. He stood still for a moment, guessing Hanzo wanted him to leave but not quite willing to let him out of his sight just yet.

 

“… You lied to me”, Hanzo said, suddenly, making Jesse jump slightly. His voice was pained, deeper than Jesse remembered.

 

“I know, darlin', I'm sorry”, Jesse apologized, taking a step forward. “I had to. was in Hanamura 'cause I was on a mission… I was lookin' for info 'bout yer clan. I knew who you and Genji were an' I was supposed ta sweet talk yer brother into tellin' me what we needed to know. But darlin', everythin' else I told you was true. Goddamn, I ain't never met anyone else like you, before or after. That night we shared together meant the world ta me. An' trust me, none of the things ya told me ever made it into my report. I wouldn't have done somethin' like that. Not ta someone like you.”

 

Hanzo heaved a deep sigh, his shoulders dropping. He turned around again, his face gentler this time.

 

“That was not what I meant”, he said. Jesse's cheeks heated up a bit. And here he was, thinking he was too old to blush. Hanzo fixated his eyes with his piercing gaze. “You told me you were no one special. You lied.” He covered the space between them slowly, Jesse's heart pounding all the way up into his throat, his chest feeling like it was about to burst. “You were special. You still are.”

 

Hanzo caught Jesse by the nape of his neck and pulled him down for a surprisingly sweet kiss. Jesse sighed into it, closing his eyes. The kiss was familiar and different at the same time, reminiscent of the kisses they had shared when they were younger and still changed by the years spent apart.

 

“Darlin'”, Jesse whispered once they moved away from each other. “Sweetheart. Honey darlin'.”

 

There was an amused huff from Hanzo, making Jesse grin. How he had longed to hear that again. Their eyes met again, sharing a tender look. Hanzo wound his fingers into Jesse's serape, keeping him close.

 

“I must admit something else”, Hanzo said. Jesse felt a little pang of worry, but did his best to ignore it.

 

“Oh?”

 

“… I never learned your name.”

 

Jesse burst out laughing, unable to help himself. He could hear Hanzo make an indignant sound, and when Jesse looked his cheeks were red, a lovely sight. Jesse leaned in close and rested his forehead against Hanzo's, drinking in the sight of him.

 

“The name's Jesse, darlin'. Jesse McCree.” He was quiet for a moment, and then smirked a little. “I've still got yer ribbon.”

 

A small smile came over Hanzo's lips as well.

 

“And I still have your scarf.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! This got a bit longer than I imagined, hehe <3
> 
> Edit: This fic has gotten fanart! :D This gorgeous picture of young Jesse and Hanzo together in bed http://infinite-atmosphere.tumblr.com/post/150322528151/hanzo-didnt-protest-love-so-sudden-and-sweet-by 
> 
> You can follow me on tumblr for updates and stuff! http://kaijuborn.tumblr.com/


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